Shawn Rumble asked 7 months ago
You may shake your head with painful memories of large dollar amounts lost, and swear on a stack speaking of Bibles that you will never again be foolish sufficient to engage in a shoot-out with the One-Armed Bandit, but who are you kidding? Maybe, with just a little luck, you will be able to resist the call of the slot machine for a few weeks, perhaps even a month or two. But you know damn well that you will be back for a rematch in the end. You cannot just let that Bandit win so quickly, can you? No way.
It is just a machine, of course, with a “brain” comprised of wires and microchips. You, having said that, are a living, breathing entity with the capacity for critical thinking and self-reflection. If humankind is to possess any hope at all in surviving the worldwide war against machines that surely will come some day, we would better at least be able to beat the slots. Think of the matter in this particular kind of sweeping historical context and you will see that it’s not simply a choice but an obligation for you to get back on the horse right away.
You might not realize that the slot machine passes by different names in overseas nations. As an example, in the United Kingdom, it really is called a fruit machine (no jokes about British drag queens, please.) In Australia, the slot is called a “poker machine,” which is much more confusing, but what can you expect from a culture that gives outdoor grills the name of just a little girl’s toy? (Let it sink in for a minute, you’ll get it.)
Anyway, traditional American slot machines are coin-operated and contain three or more reels, which spin when a lever on the side of the machine is pulled. The machines include a currency detector that validates the money inserted to play. The equipment typically pays off based upon patterns of symbols visible in the event the reels stop.
OK, enough for the description. Quite simply, onto those tips which were promised a couple of paragraphs ago:
Become intimately acquainted with each slot machine’s payout schedule. Two identical slot machines will often have radically different payouts. This matters, people.
Look for advertised slot machines offering 96-98% paybacks. Most casinos usually have a number of banks or carousels of high percentage payback slots, which is in which you should play.
Join the casino players club wherever you gamble regularly. Casinos reward players for time and expense spent. Even if you don’t hit the jackpot, you might still receive comps like meals, discount hotel rooms, as well as other perks.
This should be a no-brainer, but only play the slot machines you may afford and only spend cash you can risk losing. Seriously.
Walk away when you’re losing and become irritated. Playing slot machines is supposed to be an enjoyable pastime, not really a source of ulcer-inducing frustration. When it’s no longer fun, go get a drink and some fresh air.
